Why Don’t We Talk to Each Other Anymore?

Author: Sam Micio

If you could turn off all internet and social media right now, would you do it?

Anyone I have ever posed that question to, who was around before the internet, has always answered with a resounding “yes.”

Their children, however, have only ever known a world in which the internet is an inescapable part of life. Social interaction is becoming more and more scarce. Social media is not social at all. It is perhaps the most antisocial creation that has ever existed. It has bred an environment of constant deception, narcissism, and hopelessness that “generation z” seems to now be forced to live within. 

I have previously discussed that as engulfing as it may seem, social media is technically all voluntary. After I deleted Instagram, I started regularly climbing mountains. But it was not just the beauty of the natural environment that stood out to me. During the summer, National Forests (especially those in North Carolina and Tennessee) feel more like busy amusement parks than remote getaways. During this busy season, I encountered people from all across the world. Many of them may have posted about their experience on social media, but while in the woods, I rarely saw anyone looking at a mobile device for anything other than snapping a quick photo. 

Instead of looking at their phones, the people in the Blue Ridge Mountains were enjoying nature. Rather than watching videos taken by someone else, they were seeing the world around them for themselves. While escaping crowded areas filled with people was probably part of the goal for these individuals, there was something else I noticed. 

People spoke to one another.

I met more people on an average day in the sparsely-populated Appalachian Mountains than most days I spent in the city of Tampa, a community of over 300,000 people. Whether I was in the forests of Tennessee, the Carolinas, Georgia or Massachusetts, I seldom walked past an individual or group without at least exchanging a “good morning.” It was as if something about being in the woods made people eager to strike up a conversation with total strangers.

I’d like to contrast this situation with being on campus at the University of South Florida. In the entire academic year, hardly ever did I see people so much as say hello to one another. Which left me with questions: Why is this the case? Are people visiting the mountains, escaping the crowded urban environment, actually more social than those who live right next to one another?

As use of the internet has increased, interpersonal social interaction has dwindled. Pre-pandemic data from Pew Research Center showed that more than 68% of Americans did not know the majority of their neighbors. That was before lockdowns isolated people to an extreme degree. That was before the Wall Street Journal was running headlines like “There’s Still a Limit to How Much In-Person Socializing Many Can Handle.” 

Now I am not saying there is anything wrong with being a bit reserved. It is certainly better than being phony just for the sake of being polite. But I believe that the more genuine social interaction we have, the happier many of us will be. Do you want to be isolated? I certainly do not. And what is the deal with people cutting each other off from their lives? Given some of the things I have seen people put on the internet, it seems it is now a permissible trend to remove people from your social circle. Why? Unless someone is causing you harm, what is the point in pushing them away? I understand the idea of having a few really close friends, but why not expand beyond that and maintain relationships with those who share different beliefs, values, and cultures from your own? Is there not a greater value in having diverse friend groups? This is baffling to me because we are supposedly living in an age where we are more tolerant and accepting than ever yet it remains surprising just how judgmental and cruel people can be over the most insignificant things. 

To you, the reader, I have a challenge for you: Instead of walking around staring at your phone, interact with your surroundings and be present. Instead of cutting people off, make an effort to connect more deeply and make new friends. Instead of just messaging people on your phone, go and talk to people in real life. Have some pure social interaction. Before you decide not to, ask yourself, why not?

Note: The views expressed in this article are solely my own and not to be affiliated with any organization.